Apartments & Dogs 101

Apartment living. Someone should write a guide on apartment living. Now we've lived in apartments before, but not with 2 large dogs and 2 small children. I believe each of those are worthy of an entire book of their own: "Never Leave Your House Without a Poop Bag and 1001 Other Tips" as well as "Sleep Training Your Baby for Apartment Living."

This morning I encountered Tip #1 for the dog book: When living in an apartment, if your 2 dogs outweigh you, never (and I mean never) take them for their potty walk together. It may take more time, but it's definitely worth taking them out separately.

Now let me just say upfront...I'm okay. I took a couple advil and a hot shower, but no bruises have appeared and only minimal soreness. But this post will not contain pictures. Thought about doing the re-enactment to let JP capture it on film since he loves photography, but a girl has got to have a few boundaries...the mental image will probably be funnier anyways.

I thought I was doing a good deed this morning. Olivia and I were up watching cartoons, while JP and Isaiah were still snuggling asleep (this is part of the Sleep Training for Apartments book; I'm pretty sure the cry it out method we've had to use on occasion for Isaiah would not be welcome by our neighbors...so we've moved onto the "bring him into bed with us" method...and it appears he likes it quite well).

Anyways, the dogs were crying by the door so I grabbed my shoes and the dog leashes and headed outside for my first dog duty adventure since we moved here 2 weeks ago. And really, for apartment living, we have a great setup. Step out the front door, cross the street, and voila...a huge park with lots of grass (and a playground, which makes for easy child care duty). Lucy, Marley, and I do our jaunt through the park taking care of business fairly quick. I was almost getting proud of myself as we crossed the street. We had made it...I had made it...I can do this next week when JP starts work!

Then I see it. The dogs haven't seen it yet, but I surely have. My mind plays out the whole tragic scene about to unfold, and I try to quickly get the dogs in the door, after all, we're only 10 feet away. But then they see it too...

...a 12 pound fluffly little dog bounding straight for us with a huge smile on his face...

Now if I had stayed on the sidewalk I might have been okay...but at a combined weight of over 160 lbs and puppy energy to back it up, Lucy and Marley successfully pulled me closer to the adorable little dog and onto the grass...the wet grass...you know, from all the rain Washington gets. And my shoes slip out from under me...and I THUD to the ground. It hurt. It startled. But I held onto those leashes.

And then I slid. Yep...holding onto the leashes of 160+ dog power I was dragged across the grass...did I mention it was wet? I am just thankful I wasn't wearing a slick running suit or they might have pulled me clear back to Colorado.

But I was determined...on retrospect I should have been a little less determined...to hang onto those leashes and gain back control. And I did, once that sweet little furball came nose to nose with my two monstrous dogs and turned tail back home. Now Lucy and Marley only had good, playful intentions, but I think when that little fluff ball saw what they had reduced me to he knew he was in over his head.

I got up, brushed off my ego, and got everyone inside. I had held on and I hadn't screamed for help. I had thought about it, but in the moment I still had enough reason to know JP would never hear me and anyone else who came running would only make the dogs go even crazier.

Hoping to get a little sympathy for my ordeal I told my family about it. Olivia wanted to know what the dog's name was (I told her fluffly, or scruffy, or cutie pie...but I think I'll call him Kibble).

And while laying on the floor recovering, Isaiah came over and slapped my knees and yelled "Ow." I think it was some sort of ancient ritual inducting me into a dog walking society; something he most certainly learned from his babysitter Nick Jr during dog appreciation month.

And JP? Well, he did offer to get a pinch collar for the dogs and said I earned some sort of award for my heroism...but I'm still waiting for the award...and there was definitley a hint of laughter behind his words. I think a day at the spa would be perfect!

But at the very least, this should exempt me from dog walking duty, even though I'm going shopping for new shoes with better tread.